I gotta feelin'

:) I was jamming out to Black Eyed Peas :P Let's Do it, Let's Do it...I gotta feelin' that tonight's gonna be a good night :)

Mike is on his way to the Rams game...

I am "piddling" through the house. I LOVE "piddle" days!

Sam and Mia are playing with the neighbor kids outside, Zach is with a friend down the street...that leaves Siler...he is dressed in a Spiderman suit trying to continually raid the candy. Alex is at church....she had such a time at the Youth Convention. That girl shares my heart. (for human trafficking)

well, before I get off on a rant about that, I should go...I shall piddle and pray :) :) :)

I hope the Rams win, but if they don't? eh'  I am almost feeling "so over" football anyway. (yes, I just said that)

Humbled

Very humbled. I learned the difference today about blogging MY feelings and blogging OTHERS lives...even though their lives "affect" me..they are not MY life to blog about....

One would think that maybe that was common sense? But it wasn't for me. Hmmmm.

My blog may be getting it's second face for my 37th year...and it hasn't even been 2 months yet. :P

I have been up since 2am...I am actually feeling okay for the moment :) I am making some chicken soup with chicken stock, carrots, and Amish egg noodles. ANYTHING with egg noodles has to be FAB, right? lol

I had the BEST phone conversaton this afternoon that I couldn't possibly go into because it would take me FOREVER but I have a date in two weeks at my house that I am VERY excited about :):):) More info to come later :)
Oh shoot I am suddenly tired!

:) It's Friday :)

Today, I cut someone's hair and had a great visit during :)

Got to see Alex for a little bit before she left for a Youth Retreat.

GOT A NAP! YAYAYAYAY!!!!! I felt SO MUCH better after that!

Made turkey sausage from ground turkey and MMM MMMM it was DELICIOUS! (thanks to heavenlyhomemaker.com)..eggs and turkey sausage for dinner, with oranges and I had an avocado)

I have learned a few new songs the past couple of days...FUN FUN FUN! Sweat sweat sweat is what I do do do. :P lol

I better go get ready for bed, I have to teach in the morning. :)

I am leaving Thursday night for a weekend away.
There is a lady 15 years older than me that has known me for 30 years.
She has a picture of her wedding and I am in the back standing up to see her.
She has watched me go through some phases. :)
Today she is soooo proud of the woman that I have become. ( if you would have seen me then, you would understand)
well...it was really wild how it came about....but she bought me a plane ticket to visit her in Ft. Worth. :) Maybe she can take me neighborhood hunting :) I could, at least, get one of those HOMES magazines to see what I'd be looking at..how fun!
The itch to be clutter free has returned...I asked Alex to go to the basement with me for an hour last night..we were down there for 3 and really kicked butt...it didn't even take us the 3 hours because we stopped and talked and played a lot..SHE said she wants us to go down again and finish it off, on one of her days off...I guess my itch was contagious :)
My coffee is ready...I am NOT ready to start this day..I won't lie...
I was up too late and too early...
I am cutting someone's hair this morning and Alex is leaving on a Youth Retreat so I have to run her to the bank and blah blah..I REALLY hope I get a nap today...at least I don't have to be "on" for a class today.
WHICH BY THE WAY WE BURNED 686 CALORIES AT CLASS YESTERDAY! DaaaaNG! :)

Siler had stripped somewhere along the way?
Samantha picked out her outfit..she wanted to be a cowgirl and I actually bought her an outfit from Target but she wanted to do the outfit herself so the outfit is going back and she is happy :)
Mia is a bride, but without the veil at this point. I hope to get her one before the actual night. :)

Samantha was the only one that ran by me while I had my camera out...Mia and Zachary must have been running laps through the trunk lines with their bags :P Lord help me, there's a LOT of candy in my house :p

GOOD MORNING :)

I am starting to feel a little more like "me".
I was able to wake up this morning with joy.
I am truly embarrassed by my lunatic behavior that past couple of days.
I won't make excuses.
I say I want to follow Jesus example but I act like a fool because I have been hurt..HELLLO! 'HE was oppressed and afflicted, yet HE did not open his mouth' ~ it's in Isaiah. :)
Somewhere in Isaiah, I haven't taken the time to search for it, but it talks about FORGETTING THE PAST and living in the present, moving on...
I don't know how to do that when the hurt is still present...I don't know how to not be appalled by people.
I know the first thing I need to do is quit acting so tough..because I am not. I am one of the most tender people you could meet...cutting people out of my life isn't something that would normally be in my character.

How funny, I say I woke up with joy and now I have tears streaming down my face...but they feel, almost cleansing...like, I was able to move a boulder this morning.
I don't know where today will take me.
I know that I am tired of making excuses for things in my life.

I am sure more will come later...

Can you believe this is my baby girl???? She should be Jr. Miss America if you ask me :p

I talked to a wonderful friend today..and she assured me I am okay...I am just on "this side" of the pendulum swing. I went from one side of bending over sideways and backwards trying to please the lady who birthed me...and now I am on this side and I am ANGRY and AMAZED at her set of *****. Eventually, I will level out and I will see how angry I was and think "OH MY GOSH! I AM GLAD I AM NOT THERE ANYMORE!" There will be a day she will not effect me. :) Unfortunately, that day is not today...but there is light at the end of the tunnel.:)

Moms Gone Godly, if you are reading this..I am so excited and happy for you!!! You are one strong woman with God's hand holding you and I think you are his FAVORITE this week  :)  remember when school would have Student of the Week? ( I never got it :P but I do get my turn with my Father) :)

OLUVR, we are still on a 2-3 year plan of moving....Mike is so busy at work..he said, "I literally have enough work to keep me busy for 2 years." I said "Good! We'll move when you are done :)"

ZUMBA...I am not "down" on myself...I really cannot take it personally..but the class is still 2 people..last night it was ONE...which is fine for her and me..we had fun :) Please pray it picks up quicker because I really like my job :) not that I couldn't get a job somewhere else but I like my clients that I have there. :)

Alex is home..Gotta run :)

Good Morning :)
It's Wednesday! We are going over the hump of the week day :)
My Gluten Free Waffles just popped up..gotta go :P

ok..I have taken my husband to work...Zachary wanted to see the inside so we all went in, Zach, Siler and me....got to see where my honey works every day. :)

went to the Psych Dr. to evaluate me after taking meds for 3 months...she thinks I am doing great. I told her my concern...and she laughed at me, or with me, I should say....I told her how I used to be and how I am now and she said "YES! my manic patients are used to going 70 miles an hour so when they slow down to where the rest of the world is, at 25 miles an hour..it's REALLY slow."
so that is where I am at today....I am adjusting. :)

but my mood is much better than it was this morning..sorry I was such a crab apple :P

I am feeling content and grateful at this moment...I am going to go take care of what God has blessed me with :)

no time to talk...kind of, as always.
don't know if I will get to the story of Renee, the lady who showed up at Zumba.
My husband took his car to the shop before we left for vacation, they fixed his wheel bearings(spelling?)..
when he got his car back, there was a squeak that wasn't there before...
we dropped it off to be looked at yesterday ..[Thank you God we have two vehicles!]
A guy was backing up Mike's car to look at it while another guy was driving through the parking lot and yes, they wrecked my husband's Passat. :(
The taillight, fender and bumper.
so today I have to take him to work, again....2 hours out of my day..AGAIN! and I know I sound like a grouchazoid and I apologize..but for some reason I am not getting good sleep, I keep waking up in the middle of the night and I feel worried, but I don't know about what?

I am a little taken back at the nerve of the lady that birthed me...she has the gonads to ask Sophia to pick up Sam and Mia and take them to her house....PA LEASE! what part of YOU ARE NOT IN OUR LIFE do you not understand? She told me herself "I pray you DO MOVE ON"
and "no" she is NOT the reason I am losing sleep :P in case you were thinking that...the weird sleep and weird dreams have been a couple nights now and that just happened. :P

well, I better get off here and get ready for my crazy day....
it's money...and Zumba, and the crazy schedule that has me with a pit in my stomach..and I think my meds are too high....I am like "So this is what it feels like to not be...well, what I thought was just "me"" I don't have time to get into it...

Sorry if this was the most confusing blog ever...I hope you have a great Tuesday..I won't get to see Biggest Loser tonight so I hope I can go to my friend's house Friday to watch it on her DVR. :) and I think I want to start watching Dancing with the Stars..I caught the end of it last night, while folding clothes...OH I WANT TO BE A DANCER!

I was teaching a class this morning..I was standing with my back to the people, so they could follow my feet..and when I turned around to face them, there was a new lady standing there dancing with us :) I was like "OH HI! :)" lol

Okay, there is more to this story but my kids just got home and I have to get to them. :) (that was a good teaser to come back soon :P) LOL

I REALLY NEED TO CHANGE THE DATE ON MY CAMERA!!!!!!!!!

Zachary messing with Alex on the way to the Pumpkin Patch

Here We Go :)

Entering the Maze :)

The Corn Box

Me and My BEAUTIFUL daughter, Alex :)

Dad checking Rams score on my right

Alex texting on my left :P

Now the Olympic jumps begin :P

Zach's Nestea Plunge.

Mia lost a shoe in the corn and Siler is waiting patiently

Siler is STILL waiting and Thank you, Alex, for the butt shot...it looks like you can see right down my pants and Mike is NOT happy :P THAT SHOE WAS HARD TO FIND!

NOTE TO SELF...BRING A FRIEND FOR THIS ONE!

This is after the pumpkin patch and after Costco's frozen yogurt..the evidence is still on his cute face :)

This picture was supposed to be the first one! I was documenting from the beginning..Hmmmm :P

I AM A.D.D :P lol

This is what I meant to blog earlier :P

So! I have been watching my friends with cleaner houses...and what I have discovered is they all use WET WIPES!

I am dead serious! They use them for EVERYTHING!

One of my "neater" friends and I were talking and she was going to buy the SHARK steamer. I told her I bought it, used it, and too it right back. I said it was faster to get on my hands and knees that use that thing. We continue talking and she says she LOVES her Swiffer Sweeper (not to be confused with the Swiffer Wet Jet)...I paused..and asked, "Do you have things to pick up like Cheerios?" she says "no" and I am like "OOOHHHH!!!!!" She only has like house dust to sweep! I have cheerios, popcorn, animal crackers...BIG STUFF! No wonder I didn't love the Swiffer Sweeper :P

So then we continue talking and she says "After my daughter eats I grab a wet wipe and wipe the floor where she was sitting" I stop in my tracks and think about all the other clean friends I have and remember all the times they reached for their wet wipes..and I am like "LIGHTBULB!" and my friend is like "OH YEAH! Sandra Bullock and [I forget the other person she mentioned] just adopted children and have been introduced to wet wipes and they think ........[I don't remember what she said but something to the fact that they are the best thing since sliced bread is my comparison]"..I have been making it way too hard on myself :P

SO! At WalMart today....I bought these pretty boxes of wipes...one for each bathroom and an extra..I don't know, maybe the laundry room? Living room? Office? I don't know!!!! Alex is asking me "WHY ALL THE WIPES MOM?" and I explain to her what I just told you and she laughs and says "So you think by placing these wipes in all the rooms our house will get clean?" LOL..we had quite the laugh (and I still bought them, I'll let you know :P) Alex is not a phone talker like Sophia was or I'd be having her wipe doors and window frames...I guess I'll be doing that on my next few phone visits :)

The Binder....and the sheet protectors I purchased..are for my 37th year. The kids are ALWAYS giving me pictures, cards, etc. or I am finding beautiful letters they write to Jesus that I want to treasure...so I decided to get a new binder every year...I have 50 sheet protectors, so that is 100 items if you use front and back....

I cannot catch up with scrapbooking and stuff at this time, so I figured I would jump in where I can. :) It will also serve as my place for friend's pictures and those Christmas letters that people send :) Just WHATEVER I want to keep from my 37th year :) :) :)

ok, Jodie..I can hear you "YOU TAKE PICTURES OF BABY WIPES AND EMPTY BINDERS! WHERE ARE YOUR KIDS?" I'll try girl, I'll try :P

Sunday night 9:21 :P
Just let out a huge exhale.
Where did this weekend go?
Saturday, I taught a class, a GREAT class if I do say so myself :) I love seeing all my girls moving in the same direction at the same time, smiling. :)
After class I had a little frustration but it had nothing to do with Zumba...I shouldn't complain BUT...the owners of the dance studio told me if no one was there when I finished, just to lock up...well, there were people there to take a class and there was no instructor...so I had to stick around waiting for the instructor and it was 45 minutes after my class was over. I don't know that I should have been so annoyed, but it was not my responsibility..I am just the Zumba girl...I am not "employed" by the studio to be sticking around.
well, hopefully it will not become a habit....I always have stuff to do :P
We went to a 40th birthday party and it was also a Tribute to the Party Man's Father, who just passed away in August...there were LOTS of people and LOTS OF FOOD...thank God I burn 3000 plus calories a week because I am pretty sure I ate them this weekend :P
Today...the floors got scrubbed, laundry washed..Alex and I went to Trader Joe's, WalMart, Target, Shoe Carnival, and Schnucks...my goodness! We had a lot of fun...she called me A.D.D :P LOL You had to be there :)
I am waiting for the washer to complete so I can switch the load and I need to go to SLEEP.
I need to find my MP3 player and plug it in for Zumba tomorrow morning :) :) :)
I feel like I am going to fall asleep right here, right now :)
I better stand up before I do. hahahah
Talk to you tomorrow..I don't know about what...I ran into the girl that used to be my sister today at Target...I smiled and said "hello". Alex was feeling quite awkward. I felt bad for her (Alex)....
well, anyhoo Good Night :)
see you soon.

Sitting for a moment. Drinking some coffee.Getting ready to teach a ZUMBA class. :P The house is quiet.
I already ran Alex up to church so she could help set up for an ALL YOU CAN EAT PANCAKE BREAKFAST fundraiser. The youth group is going on a mission's trip to Hawaii. ( I know, TOUGH job..but someone's gotta do it :P)

We are going to a little party on a lake today. Well, it's a big party, actually, but we are going for a short period of time...but long enough to visit with some friends and short enough that my heart won't shrivel to nothing from stress of having my boys there. :) yes, I'm chuckling..they'll be fine..that's what leashes are for....:P ok, I am cracking up now...I am JUST KIDDING!!!!!! whew! someone slipped something in my coffee or something's got my funnybone tickled. :P

Yesterday was quite interesting.
I got a surprise phone call from one of my bestest besties!!! :) :) :) She started working fulltime a few years ago and it really rocked my world because we used to talk almost daily..and when she started working I was like ???????? lol! But we adjusted and she loves her job so YAY!!!! but she had the day off yesterday and we got to hang on the phone for TWO HOURS :) :) :) (I did clean while we talked and my kids made sure and got my attention during that time :P)  I wish I could REALLY help my friend...but I know she is in good hands and just being here is all I am able to do..so THAT is what I will do. :) :) :) I really really really really love this girl. A lot a lot!

I also watched the Princess Bride for the first time yesterday...and ended up watching it TWICE. Once during the day with Alex, Sam, Zach, and Siler and then again at night with Mike, Sam, Mia, Zach, and Siler. YES! MY TWO YOUNG BOYS SAT THROUGH IT TWICE! but I am returning it to its righful owner today. :) and now I can say I have seen it. :)

well, I am looking at the clock and knowing I have to get out of here...
Have a good weekend if I don't make it back :P

I am cracking up reading my blog...Lots of talk about poo and what not. I am scared to type what is really on my mind anymore. The last time I did I received an e-mail blasting me from here to eternity and back. The things that were said to me were a lie and quite ridiculous but I can tell you..when you get an e-mail that starts with THE BEST FOUR WORDS TO DESCRIBE YOU ARE LIAR PSYCHO SELFISH BITCH...it stops you dead in your tracks. Especially when it comes from "family". Then when your Mom (supposed to be your protector, I thought?) knows about the note and does NOTHING and the THOSE people have your daughter....I don't know...it sucks.

It's Friday.

What I learned this morning is...when the little tug on your hand and the little voice asking.."WILL YOU PLAY WITH ME?" This is NOT an interruption. This is an invitation to RECESS time. I am going to say that I am 80/20 on when I stop what I am doing to go play...MAYBE 70/30. but I would like to change that. Zach and Siler LOVE when I go PLAY outside with them...and once I am out there..I enjoy them too.
and it's not like I get a HUGE advance on stuff around here by saying "no sweetie, Mommy has too much to do" Like 10 minutes outside or on the floor or whatever they want to do..is going to hurt this house. :p
LOL

Samantha just brought me the paper for Talent Show sign ups for school. Time to get practicing. I have NO IDEA what she wants to sing this year..but it will be beautiful and I will try my hardest to get it on here.

I pray I have time to play, time to pay bills and time to rest today....:) and I pray you are super blessed. :)

I told a friend this today but I thought I would share..OLUVR, YOU will understand FOR SURE!
You know how when you CAN'T run, you WANT to...but then when you CAN, you don't WANT to anymore?
Well, my schedule has me so running in circles (and I am not even sure why?) that I cannot keep on a "cleaning schedule" NOT THAT I EVER HAD ONE!!!!
ANYWAY..now that I don't "have time" to clean...I LOVE TO CLEAN! :P lolololol

I crack me up.

well, that's all I have time for , for now....I may take some "me" time soon and actually sit and do a nonstress blog. :P

ok, hypothetically...I had thought about refinishing our coffee table....(because I have time :P)
well, this morning Siler is beating it with his play hammer and sawing it vigorously so I have to smile and know..that I love having a beat up coffee table that I don't have to cringe when my boys are boys. :P

I think I learned a new song yesterday. I need to practice it before class tonight. It's a WHOPPER cardio wise. :) There is this one song we do that burns 60 calories..in like 3 minutes! I need to throw on my heart rate monitor and check this one out :P

well, shoot..it's always the doodie...I just smelled a Siler and that is my que to exit. :/

it's cool though I need to laundry and shower and all those good things :P

Loving you MUCHO MUCHO! Have a great Thursday :)

TOTALLY OVERDRAWN AT THE BANK. :( I don't even want to look at the statement to see what we did..Iknow what we did...we went out this weekend and spent $$$ like we had it to spend...the Pumpkin Patch and Costco...and one of "THOSE" trips to WalMart where you have to but RAZORS and TP and everything else at the same time..and you leave looking at your receipt scratching your head going,"I DIDN'T EVEN BUY FOOD!"
Add that to the depression I already had building. :P

I am thinking it's time to start hitting the tanning bed once a week (with my extra cash :P) I already feel the cold blahs...it's not even November yet..but it's close enough. :P (and you all know I am just jawing..I don't have time to tan..but I would love to)

so, subjects that matter....had a good class today...3 people...but we had FUN :)
Actually, the bus just pulled up with my beautiful daughters so I am going to go..see you again soon. ::) ::) ::)

Today HAS to be better than yesterday :) I had like a mental breakdown...all better :P

There are SOOOO many things that were made clear yesterday..I don't have time to talk about them .but Life made sense for a minute :P lol

I am off to Zumba and then I am taking the boys to the park...I think a friend and her boys are going with me...I hope so, or I might back out (I have not told the boys we are going ;p)

Have a great Wednesday..

I broke down and called my daughter. Doesn't that sound funny? That I should be scared to call my daughter? She sounds really great :) She is having a blast at school. I am soooo happy for her. :)

so very very tired.

My first born daughter started beauty college yesterday. It has been her dream for as long as I can remember. She did her first haircut when she was 4. Took the scissors to Alex's hair and boy did she do a job on it. :P
We are not involved, at all, in the period of her life. It  is very strange. I'm okay, but there is definitely a weird hole...but you know? My mom and I don't talk. and I seriously doubt we ever will again. I, as the daughter, could care less...so maybe that is where Sophia will always be. weird.

My son, Siler...was sitting next to me and I could smell "dirties" I put him on the toilet and he didn't want to stay...he just wanted a diaper. I see him over there getting ready to go and I asked him "Do you want to go on the potty?" "NO!" "oookkkkk" it is soo weird sitting here knowing I will be changing a poopy diaper in a sec...he usually has NO problems sitting on the toilet, I wonder why it's different today? but "THEY" say..don't force the issue, so I'm not??? I am soooo glad this is my last child in diapers! He will be 3 in December. I hope he doesn't take as long as his older brother to train, but if he does...so.be.it.

I am teaching Zumba tonight. I pray this funk passes soon. I have that anxious can't breathe feeling...( I also have not had quiet time this morning so THAT explains a LOT right there...)

well, I should go see if Siler has completed his poo...Gosh I am a joyful blogger this morning :P LOL
xoxoxoxoxo
BIGGEST LOSER TONIGHT!
love y'all...
Happy Tuesday :)

I just realized that is has been a week since I was having a VERY bad day and I called a neighborhood lady to go on a walk with me and I "BLAAAAHED" all over the place and I haven't talked to her since. I feel kind of like a piece of crap. :/ though I know I didn't do it on purpose, I just had to get out of the house and ..yea. Maybe I can take her out for coffee on a good day to make up for it? :)

I went for coffee today with a Zumba girl. :) She is the second girl to tell me how her husband can tell a big difference in her. :) I just smile and glow when I hear these things :) :) :)

If you have been with me for a while, you might remember my struggle with SHOULD I OR SHOULDN'T I SELL SCENTSY? and of course NOT won. and it wasn't because I didn't like it....I just didn't feel it was furthering me in a direction where God could use me? But I couldn't put it in words?
If I were still selling Scentsy, I would not have joined the gym. I would not have discovered Zumba and I wouldn't be an instructor today. :) I am soooo glad I listened to that still small voice :) :) :)

I just had the CUTEST curly hair almost three year old boy walk in the house and yell. "MOOOOM!"
I answered and he walked over all adorable like and said "oh he you r" MELT ME like Chocolate I love this kid!!!! I have to run for now :) He wants a BA! (milk) :P

I cannot tell you how desperately I want to just sit here and type away..but I only have one hour child free and I need to work :( UGH!!!!

It is a 4am wake up day

I haven't seen this hour in a long time. (well, it's 5:30 now)

God is so cool. That is what I know. :)

I am getting ready to start my second load of laundry this morning. :) My girlfriend has a FAMILY closet downstairs...I used to tell Mike ALL THE TIME that I wanted one , when we lived in Fort Smith. I told him..I can't do laundry during the day because it's constant interruptions with children and I can't put stuff away at 5am because everyone is sleeping and once 8pm hits..I AM TIRED! Like Wiped-Out tired where if I have to move one more muscle I'll fall over :P Maybe I am just lazy and don't want to deal with laundry? I really don't think that is the case..I think once Siler is a little bit older, I'll get this laundry thing down...but while kids are young? A FAMILY  closet away from the bedrooms would ROCK! (and then their closets could be toy rooms :p)

well, now that I just wasted 10 minutes foolish talking...I must type slow :P lol (it's 5:40 though)

OK...this morning...Get kids stuff together as soon as I get off here...
Zachary and Siler have school
I have a Zumba class
I am supposed to get coffee after class with one of my Zumba girls. Her birthday was on a day I was on vacation so I want to take her out.
AND THEN..the struggle with what to do with 2 hours alone time!!!
I need to go by the gym and settle financial matters
I need a haircut
Should go to the chiropractor
Want to go get new Zumba shoes with more support for my sweet feet that carry me around all day long. :)
Would like to do housework stuff BUT if I get off here and kick butt for an hour I could get that done before kids get up! :) (downstairs anyway)

I hate that I get anxious when I wake up early like this. I am already dreading the early PM hours.
Every Monday I pick up the boys..run home, get Alex, run her to work, and run home (none of these locations are near each other, of course)
Tuesdays are almost worse? Run her to work, pick up kids from school, run to my work, and then back to Alex's work and then back home....

EVERYTHING in the area I live is 15-20 minutes apart :P

well, this might possibly go down as my most boring blog in history but it's what's on my mind :)
I am listening to the 80's station on the television...LOVE IT! I might have to change it to the 90's and see what's up...I probably like that era too. :)

I love Joyce Meyer.

ok..it's 5:48...ready, set, GO!

(I love you have a good day xoxoxoxxoxoxo)

I wonder how many posts I have started with HOLY MOLY! or HOLY SHAMOLY!!! :P
This is one of those. :P LOL
Well, really...I guess they ALL are because how often does a woman just get time to herself? Without a million things to do..without feeling guilty for taking the time? I was getting better about "taking care of me" but I am slipping and I need to get it back. I guess because we went on vacation and this last week has been desperately trying to catch up and has been VERY UNSUCCESSFUL.
Vans breaking down, I-PHONES, and playlists going bonkers...Teenager schedule (need I say more about that one? ;p)

I think Mike is going to take Alex car shopping very soon. She needs a car to practice that is not a 15 passenger van or a stick shift. She has saved $1000. We are very proud of her. :) (yes, she will have to get a small loan for the rest unless we happen upon a great car for that amount...it could happen ;p)

Yesterday, that "flu feeling" took over my body. UGH!
We were invited to the neighbors house for a bonfire and I really wanted to go...so I did..but I felt poopy the whole time...I was freezing and sore. :(...I slept until ELEVEN O'CLOCK this morning...you know I didn't feel well!

We took the family to the pumkin patch today. Alex went with us. I didn't force her but I didn't ask her if she wanted to stay home either...it was 12:12pm and she was still in bed...I simply went in and said "we are going to the pumpkin patch" and she asked, "Can I have 5 minutes to get ready?" but I felt bad for her because she just sat there (well, she had her texting)...but we went to Costco afterwards and she likes it there. I would NEVER recommend having "2 families"...it is so hard having teens and tots.

well, my throat is sore and it doesn't feel like I am "sick" it feels like I am "exhausted" and I have to ZUMBA in the A.M. so I should probably hop off here and go to bed. :)

I will try to get pictures uploaded soon. (yea yea Robbie, that's what you always say :P) lol

xoxoxoxoxoxx Good Night!!! :D

I just about UNDELETED my old blog. My finger was on the button. Why not? Oh yea, I remember. :/ I don't know, I still might. It's My Life. :)

OF COURSE THEY ARE $400!!!!!!!

I have been on the hunt for tall "riding" boots. FOREVER! I saw some I wanted 3 years ago but they were like $200 and you know as parents of several children...that is a LOT of money...well, I WISH I would have got  them when I saw them..because I have wanted them EVERY year since..and had I got them then..I would have already got 3 years out of them!  sooo...I have been looking and looking and looking and looking...and NOTHING that I LOVE...I was on MACY's webpage for another reason and I thought, "LET ME SEE WHAT THEY HAVE?" and as I am scrolling through (not looking at prices) I saw them...I clicked, I saw..and THEN..I SAW, OF COURSE THEY ARE COACH AND $400!  COME ON! That is almost the cost of a new dishwasher for me!!!! Can someone find me a knock off pair??? PLEASE? :) :) :)

I DO NOT LOVE SHOPPING!!!

I made it to the consignment store.
Walked out with 2 pair of jeans and 5? tops? yes, 5. Two black, One White, One Grey, and one Grey and Navy Blue (UH OH! VENTURING OUT!)

I found a pair of ADORABLE navy blue and white Converse online at Macy's..they are not the typical CHUCKS..though I LOVE those and kind of want to get a pair or two. I really hate physically going to the store to shop. If I knew these pair would fit me, I would SOOOO order online...BUT! I don't want to wait for shipping just to find out they don't work ya know???

I have officially made it to a size 6 :) That was my final destination so hear on out is maintenance , which is GREAT :)

I am going to get my boys rounded up and REST! I am so excited to REST! :)

Friday Morning. Thank God it's Friday!!!

Meeting a girlfriend and her Canadian Mama at a consignment shop this morning. Her mom visits quite frequently so she may have already discovered this particular store, but if not? She is in for a treat :)
I need to go (and I don't know that I will be successful with my boys in tow) all of my jeans are falling off me. That is great and not because I don't have clothes, at this time. I don't need a lot but a couple would be great :)

ok, OUT OF THE BLUE...my iphone decided to sync. ??? It's too long (and boring) to explain..just talking out loud.

Payday today. Gave generously and cheerfully and I feel better. Not bragging or boasting just stating...it TRULY IS so much better to give than receive.

I am wanting to make a big pot of potato soup and invite neighbors over tonight...maybe have a bonfire in the backyard after dinner? If I make it, will they come??? LOL..if not? We will have lots of leftover soup :P
I would love to take some to my sister (who LOVES potato soup) but she told me we are no longer sisters....thank you very much. I cannot wait to move away from here. It is SO pathetic that people ask me if we have family here and I am like "uuuuum" the answer is "no".

back to happy thoughts..yes, I think I will get the ingredients after the consignment shop and do that..It'd be great for us to have people over :)
Faith, Encouragement and Hospitality are my gifts after all :)

I got the best e-mail this morning from one of my Zumba girls :) She stated that her husband can really tell a difference since she started Zumba and she said THAAAAANK YOU!!!! How precious is the gift God has given me!!!!!

well, xoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo Happy Friday to YOU! :)

Deep breath OUT. Just got home from my Zumba class. I feel great. I made a decision that I feel REALLY good about..I LOVE when that happens :)

Zachary keeps asking me to rent Treasure Planet for him. :) I am seeing that on a Christmas list..but in the meantime, I am thinking a trip to Blockbuster is in my night forecast.

Toy Story III is at the $1 show and I would LOOOOVE to take the kids..but tonight is the last night and I really don't think I could stay awake.:p

I have nothing significant to report, just saying "hi".

Pretty sure I am in God's will...Not sure if other people will appreciate that. Can't worry about it. Hoping for the best.

I have 30 minutes until I have to leave. I need to get dressed, do my hair (or throw a hat on) and some make-up. I cannot wait to have this i-pod situation fixed. I have class tonight and then a break :) until Saturday morning. :)

Alex is out taking her driver's test this afternoon.

I better go...I went through the box of papers but they are still there :P
Laundry can only go as fast as the washer and dryer will let it :)
Talk to you soon :)

I am sitting here with a WHOLE avocado...mashed up with cilantro and salt..mmm mmm mmm (I don't do well with that quarter of avocado that's recommended! WHATEVER!) LOL

WOW the last three days have been wicked wild!

I am sending the boys to Moms Time Out tomorrow because I have a box of papers that HAS to be gone through...I hope I am ruthless and hold on to NOTHING that is not important. Lord Help Me. :)

I also need to do the WalMart run that I have been putting off since I got home..but honestly, there are no funds to do that (NOT COMPLAINING! NOT POOR MOUTHING!!! just saying.) Maybe I will just grab diapers and see if everything else can wait until Friday..but then I will have my boys with me..BUT I don't have to work and my bos of papers will be finished so I probably can handle that better because I won't be as stressed. THERE! Thank you :) I just thought out loud and it's resolved :) (For That Matter..Maybe I can get a few diapers donation (or even LOANED :P) to hold me over and avoid WalMart all together!!!! NOW I'M THINKING! :) :) :)
Shoot, I bet I can find some if I clean the van out and then THAT would kill a couple birds (WHY DO WE SAY THAT???)

ok...I have to tell you that I was on my way to teach Zumba this morning and a baby squirrel jumped in front of me...he ran this way and that way and you KNOW I swerved...OH MY GOSH! I WAS DEVASTATED! I thought I missed him..I didn't feel a thing...but I looked in my rearview mirror. :( :( :(
I was like "HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GO BE CHEERY AT ZUMBA NOW????" so I called a girlfriend and she was having a much worse day than me so she pulled me out of that jam. :(
THEN!!!!!!! we were leaving the orthodontist and there was this MOST FURRY catepillar crossing the parking lot...I stopped to show Siler...(and Zach) but I was like smiling and saying "LOOK :) do you want to touch it?" (YOU KNOW THAT WAS A STRETCH FOR ME!!!!!!!!!) and Zachary walks up and STEPS ON IT! *GASP!!!!!!* I was like "WHY DID YOU DO THAT??????" and he was like "I don't know. " oh my gosh...break my heart again....so yea, the Niccums and animals weren't compatible today :P I told Zach if the bugs are in their own home (OUTSIDE) he is NOT to stomp them. Me sweet baby boy :P

well, that is not at all where I intended my blog to go. :P but it is 10:35 and I really need sleep. I prob won't be back tomorrow unless it is a quick HI I LOVE YOU! but if I don't make it back, know that I am thinking HI!!! I LOVE YOU...Can't wait till I can stay and write a while...
(I really need to...I keep hearing my book in my head)

Good night.
xoxoxoxo

Today is even more full than yesterday...I cannot wait until Friday. :) I never used to live for the weekend because they were exactly the same as Mon-Fri except more people were home which meant even more work :P
but now! (don't get me wrong..I LOOOOOOVE Zumba!!!!) Having a job, no matter how part time it is...is just different. :) My body is sore and tired (from traveling and not working out for a week and now jumping right back in) but it doesn't matter..I HAVE to be ON. :)

I have something serious to talk to y'all about..I am considering starting a private blog somewhere else...I don't know. I have a lot of emotions running through my body but I want to remain in God's will...I will take it one day at a time and trust God that He will steer me in the right direction.

but for now...I have to go shower and get kids ready for school and the boys ready to go Zumba with me...and then the rest of the day...holy moly, my chest got a little tight thinking about it..DEEP BREATH IN and let it all out. The day will be over around 8 :) That's only a little over 12 hours from now. I can do it! :) :) :) LOL

Have a terrific day! As always, I love all of you..very very much! I don't take my friends for granted, EVER!
xoxoxoxxo

I am sitting down to eat lunch and hoping that that justifies why I am sitting at all with the one million and one things I need to be doing.
yesterday was a day from you know where...starting from not being able to locate things the girls needed for school (because we JUST got back) to my ipod breaking (that I need for Zumba) to my van breaking down...and leaving my purse somewhere....
but on the flip side..the girls got to school safely and had a great day...I was able to teach my class, we just had to use the same playlist we have been using (oh well, plenty of time to change it up)..God provided the money for us to fix our van...my purse was taken care of by an angel..and my husband and children's health are great..my marriage is strong, we have all our needs provided..God is Good and I have no reason to complain.

The funny thing about yesterday is.. I did wake up grateful...I got in the shower FIRST thing and had this clear running water flowing out of the nozzle and it wasn't quite warm enough so I turned around and adjusted the faucet just a tiny bit...and AHHH, perfection....of course I am thinking about the people who live without and asking God to please continue to give me the balance between humbleness and gratefulness. I love Him so much and am thankful for all my blessings....I am sitting here grateful for my crappy day yesterday..because it brought me back to the end of myself where I can look UP to Him and then focus on the needs of others...because Lord knows compared to others, my needs are petty.

Prayers continued for the sweet 10 year old girl fighting for her life...I really wanted to see one of God's miracles and hear about her healing...but from what I hear, she is at the end...God knows why...and I know she will be happy with him...Praying for true comfort for the parents...but still praying for a last minute MIRACULOUS HEALING! Please Father..You can do it.

ok, I am off to hug my boys that are in constant bicker state with each other..and then I am off to shower and get ready to pick up my daughter from school, run her to the chiro and then to work and then go get my other daughters and go teach a Zumba class and then back to get the daughter from work. :) and with all that..I am thankful for the means to get her chiro therapy, thankful for my NOW running van..thankful for my perfect job and once again thankful for my healthy children. God Bless You.

I couldn't possibly be PMSing already!!!! Why am I feeling ALL GUSHYish???? I want to save the world for heaven's sake!

Go check out Mollie Land Adventure's blog...Sam's visit..the pictures are precious!!!! It is Mollie, OLUVR's daughter and Samantha, my daughter. :)
They really bonded this trip. :):):)

I am home. I have done loads and loads of laundry. :P
I really really need to ZUMBA.
I have so much to say and I really dislike when I don't have time to just chill and type. :/ but I don't....I probably won't be back in the groove for a couple days. (unless I steal some time tomorrow after Zumba and before I pick up the boys from Moms day Off ;p)

You are in my thoughts and I pray for you. I don't know your needs but HE does and I pray His will for you. :) :) :)

xoxoxoxxo

I am not sure is it is completely allergies or if I am sick but either way, I don't feel fantastic..BUT! This place is a TRUE vacation...NO KIDDING!!! I seriously want to move to Dallas in a couple of years so we can be just a few hours from here (HERE, being the Oliver home). It is another lakehouse...like the one we stayed at in Eufala, and we, Niccums, would love to live 4 hours from each lakehouse, SMACK DAB in the middle!!! I feel it in my bones....it'll happen.
Alex always tells me she wants to go back to Fort Smith...Dallas is closer than where we are now. :)
Speaking of Alex, OH MY GOSH! She got the most beautiful Sweet 16 photos taken tonight...I will let you know when they are posted on the OLUVR blog...when you combine OLUVR's talent and Alex's beauty...I am speechless :)

well, we head out of here tomorrow morning....and heading to Fort Smith...we will be there for 2 days and then we head home...back to real life...work, school. house stuff..but we have rested and we are feeling content. Great Friends, Great Times, Life is Worth Living to the FULLEST. :) :) :)

<3 You!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxo

ON THE ROAD AGAIN. :)

it's Wednesday.
we left Monday morning at 10am. We were ready much earlier BUT I couldn't find my Zumba cd/dvd case, and I was NOT leaving until I found it. I have to learn a few songs while I am on the road for when I get back Monday. :) (which I have successfully done in the van..though I haven't ACTUALLY danced them :P)
Monday evening we arrived at my girlfriend, Serena's. She lives on Lake Eufaula. She built a 3 car detached garage with a full size loft above...it has a HUGE kitchen, living area, full size bath, washer, dryer, and all the games. Pool table, Fooz ball, shuffle board, Ping Pong....that is the upstairs..downstairs, there is a trampoline, fire pit, grill, hammock, and golf cart. :P To say my kids were in heaven might be an understatement. :)

I was, of course, very happy to catch up with my friend. :) :) :)

Tuesday...packed and left the house by 10am...next stop, Fort Worth. We visited the Stockyards..which typocally wouldn't be my place to visit...but it was actually quite interesting! There was a man riding a horse down the cobblestone street. A man with a bull, if you paid $3 you could get your picture on the bull. :) We saw the first saloon established in the 1800s and the street where a police and gambler had a famous..what do you call that when two men hold a gun and shoot at each other???? I guess the gambler owed the cop some money and they fought each other in the street and one shot the other one's thumb off so the other one couldn't shoot his pistol? I didn't REALLY get to listen because I had 4 yound children who couldn't care less about the history of Fort Worth so we headed to a store to buy an ice cream cone for each of them..I thought I would then be able to listen to our personal tour guide...but the ice crea, cones brought on a whole different issue...the melting in the sun, right? LOL

For dinner, we went to RioMambo where my husband, the good one, got Salmon. I, on the other hand, got grilled brisket tacos with melted monterey jack cheese...YUM!!!!! and of course, guacamole!

there is so much more to tell about this particular stay..but we just turned onto the road where Oliver lives...we are 5 miles away so I need to wrap this post up and GO!

I will try to catch ya'll again Friday. We will be driving again..7 hours, I think...but know that I am having a FABULOUS time as you read this..catching up with great friends!!!! :) :) :) Two nights of F U N!!!!

It's 5:15, everyone is sleeping.
I need to shower, pack..blah blah blah yada yada yada. :P
Did I mention yesterday how absolutely sore my legs are? I can hardly bend my knees.
The phone rang last night...I was upstairs and all the cordless phones were downstairs.
Me "I can't get that!"
Alex "MOM!!! COME GET THIS, I CAN'T COME UPSTAIRS!!!"
Me "I CAN'T COME DOWNSTAIRS!!!"
I go to the top of the stairs and we just look at each other, both with dread in our eyes..LOL!!!
Alex "let's meet halfway?"

oh my gosh! it was so much more dramatic than this blog can make it sound. :P LOL

The christian station is playing all kinds of new songs that I love..but they are not on Project Playlist yet...I wonder how people upload songs to Project Playlist.?
I like Chris Tomlin's "WHERE YOU GO I'LL GO, Where you stay I'll stay, when you move, I'll move, I will follow you."
I don't know who sings these but there is a "It happens in a blink it happens in a flash, it happens in the time you take to look back...slow down!"
another one is "no matter what, I'm gonna love you..."
and I am NOT a Newsboys fan....BUT! Their latest is "BORN AGAIN" or something like that...it ROCKS!
Alex and I are going to buy them from i-tunes but I want to put them on my playlist.

Oh my goodness, I almost forgot to tell you....on the sidebar where my blog links are...Samantha, my daughter, has a blog, Sam's Awesome Life...if you want, you should jump over there and read her ABOUT ME..she is AMAZINGLY CUTE! :)

well, I guess I should get off here and get moving. It is always nice to catch up with you. ;)

it's 10:40 and I am still doing laundry, but I think it is the last load. :) I wanted to leave at 5am....LMBO!!! I don't think sooooo!

we are SOOOOOO excited! We are going to see SO MANY wonderful friends this vacation! I am almost teary eyed thinking about it! The visits will all be short but appreciated! It'll hold us over until the next time. :)

The Rams won today but my race threw me all off and I MISSED IT! UGH! lol
and they played SEATTLE! I LOOOOOOVE beating Seattle!!!!! :)

I am still try to heal a wounded heart. I keep thinking if I don't talk about it, it won't exist. I wish I could just forget.

oh well, on a much happier note...I am going to bed to have sweet dreams and have the best family vacation EVER. We are NOT going to the beach, I don't know why Mike and ever thought that would be a vacation. :P Maybe if we were alone..but with a ton of kids? Um, NO! lol

Don't know when I will be back so you have a fabulous week. I hope I have lots of pictures to share when I get back. :)

oh! I burned 1995 calories in my race, and my time was 2:13:16..not bad. :)

I want you to hear this LOUD and CLEAR....I DID say that I wanted to run a Marathon. I DON'T ANYMORE! NOPE! I don't even want to run a half marathon again! nope nope nope!!! and I will be sad when Alex goes on to do them and I am only on the sideline cheering but SO BE IT! I will cheer for her! No more running for me!

I was doing REALLY well until about mile 8. then I lost ALL my great time. Miles 8-10 were really awful! and then around mile 11 I was looking around for a getaway car..In my head I was saying "I was just kidding! I don't really want to do this!!! Around mile 12...I am like "OK! This is almost over and I never have to do it again!" and then I see my husband in the van with Sam, Mia, Zach, and Siler CHEERING me on. :) Oh my heart SMILED and it gave me the boost I needed to finish that last 1.1 mile. :)

We went to Steak and Shake afterwards. That was the BEST part of the race! The Post race nummies!..then I came home, collapsed, napped for an hour, now I am telling you about it and now I have to go!!! I have to pack! :) We are HITTING THE ROAD! VACATION!!!! :) :) :) WHOOO HOOOOO!!!!

:)I should probably ice my knees for a bit. I'm a mess. :P

Today is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.:)

Today is the day Alex and I run our race... We will be thankful that we have legs that move...as well as all our fingers, toes, hands, and feet. I will be back much later to tell you about it. :) I pray you have a blessed day :) :) :)

Hey y'all, a quick check in....my headache is back. Today was the first day I taught a class without taking Excedrin or Motrin...and I was fine...until after...I told Mike it is my big hair and all the jumping, rattling my brain around. :) :) :) LOL!!!
My husband is beckoning me, break over :)
I am starting to REALLY! freak out about how cold it is going to be tomorrow morning.

what a crazy morning

DUH!!!! I was supposed to have Alex to work at 8:30...NOT LEAVE AT 8:30!!! We are driving down the road and I am panic attacking..WHY IS THIS TAKING SO LONG? I SHOULD BE AT THE DANCE STUDIO!!!!and I didn't even have her to work yet...OH MYGOSH!!! It was raining. Mike's car kept telling me to STOP. literally, the word STOP , followed by BRAKE FAULT was showing up....I am LORD JESUS? PLEASE LET ME GET THERE AND BACK? PLEASE?

I get to the studio at NINE O'CLOCK (when class should be STARTING)..I say "GOOD MORNING!" with the biggest smile possible. :) The owners are out of town, the radio I used last week is broke, and no one knows how to use the other one..all I have to do is plug my iphone in..but there are 4 of us trying to figure it out and it's not working. :/
One lady calls her teen daughter (@9:10ish on a Saturday morning)..she gets it working for us...geez....
the class officially started at 9:15 and it only goes until 9:45. :(
but I worked those ladies out. YES I DID! :)

okay, well, now that THAT is done and I can breathe again...and I did the skating rink stop CHECK. Mike did the sticker thing online CHECK. I am going to make some bacon and maybe pancakes and then hit the rest of my list..I think I might take 10 minutes and chase my boys around the house and wrestle them...Siler is getting quite good at Kung Fu. SOOOO CUTE!!!

Worn out, as I am every night...I went to bed and watched A FEW GOOD MEN. Goodness, I love that movie!!!! I made it to the part where he looked in his closet holding his baseball bat and says "I'm running to the office." and they say "he does think better with that bat." It went to commercial (I was watching it on TBS) and I woke up to see that TBS was showing the movie again...I MISSED THE BEST PART!!! "I WANT THE TRUTH!" "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!" if you have not seen that movie...go get it right now, it's AWESOME!

Today..I have a class to teach this morning...I don't know if I am going to remain an instructor at this particular studio, but I don't want to get into it right now.
I need to go get a new sticker for my van
I didn't make it to the skating rink so I need to do that FOR SURE.
I have the clothes to take to consignment
well, you know the drill, I have a lot to do...

It is going to be 37 degrees when I run tomorrow. HOLY CRAP!!!!

I told this lady a couple days ago how I could get my house "company ready" in ten minutes. I didn't think I was lying at the time...but now I am thinking I was.
Today, as I was on the phone with people..getting subs for classes, getting prescription refills, taking care of mattresses, yada yada....I had about 6 tornados go through my house. It took me TWO HOURS to get back to START.
and START isn't completely FABULOUS but it's tolerable. :P
I will not worry about this at this time..I will not I will not I will not...Fresh start in about ten days. :)
I have a list of things to do...Rotating through my head.....
1.) Get DVDS back to the owner
2.) Library
3.) Great Skate to drop something off
4.) Fleet Feet to pick up my running packet for my race this Sunday and I need inserts for my shoes and one of those things to cover my sweet ears so they don't freeze. THAT HURTS!!!! (cold ears while running)
I cannot believe Alex and I are jogging 13.1 miles Sunday :)

okay, I better hop off here and get my children dressed for the running I have to do...

oh, the reason I got on here was to tell you....I don't know how to cook, not REALLY. I can follow a recipe but I really really do NOT like to cook...I would use the "h" word..but it's not really necessary :P
anyway..we are just about out of food and not wanting to go shopping, I thought I'd make oatmeal..YUM! I get the big things of oatmeal at Costco and pour them into a Tupperware container so I don't have the recipe written down. (yes, I need a recipe for oatmeal!) I googled "how to make oatmeal" and I could not find the simple basic recipe. GEEZ!
In the meantime, Zachary couldn't wait so he mixed some oatmeal and either water or milk in a measuring cup....I was thinking "my baby is HUNGRY I better get moving!"
so I poured what was left of the almond milk, the mixture Zachary made, some water and some more oats..I have NO IDEA what the recipe was..but it was by far the BEST oatmeal any of us have ever had! Go Figure! :/

ok, I am really going now! If this is your first stop in today...go down two journal entries (well, the beginning of today)..it's worth the read, if I do say so myself :P

you will have to read my former post to understand this one but THE MATTRESSES are GONE and I have confessed the WHOLE story to my husband and the only response her had was a little laughter and he said "you are funny." I laughed about the fact that he never knows what his little wife is doing running around town but assured him that I pray every morning and tell God I am His to do whatever, so I am fine...and he laughed a little more...WHEW! I feel a little lighter now. :P

UPDATE: THEY DID NOT TAKE THE MATTRESSES! :/ another update in my comments

Tuesday...I told God I wanted to be His hands and feet. He knows I also wanted to be his eyes and voice.
Tuesday night I had an opportunity to "help" someone.
Wednesday I had an opportunity to "help" someone.
Thursday, I called a girlfriend. A very dear to me girlfriend. This girl is married to a man that acts EXACTLY like the lady that gave birth to me.
(For those of you that have been with me the last three years, I don't have to say anymore. If you are new to my blog, you will have to come up with your own scenerios at this time because I don't want to talk about her, I don't want to be angry..just know that I want NOTHING to do with her..I think she treats me AWFUL and though I can forgive her....she is POISON to me.)
Going back to my girlfriend who HAS to live with her husband and is not able to walk away from her poison as I got to.....
I called her Thursday to tell her about my "helping" adventures. When she answered, she was ___________..I could say distraught, there are NO words for how she was feeling. I listened. I listened more. When she ran out of words and I had no comforting words for her (I would consider jumping off a bridge if I had to live with the woman who gave me birth and remember, she is "stuck" with this man that represents her)...I decided to lighten the mood by going ahead and telling her about my adventures (because when I tell them with my voice, not on here, they are HILARIOUS!) The fact that I am VERY animated, helps :P
She doesn't laugh. She says "I wish I could join you but if I were to do something like that my husband would call me crazy." I felt so bad, and with nothing more to say...I am assuming we hung up...
yesterday, I went to the Bible and found a verse that was telling her to HOLD ON! It was a word of HOPE. God is a rescuer...and He is on His way...
I told her where to go to read it....
we are talking and it came to a point in the conversation where she said she wanted to end her life. For some reason, I wasn't worried....(it kind of made me question how good of a friend I really am? Should I have called her sister? Should I have called a hotline and had her picked up?) All I could think about was writing what I would say at her funeral...which I will share with you in a minute
The day goes by and she calls me to tell me she had an ALL DAY coffee with a friend of hers..and great words were spoken..things that we tell each other ALL THE TIME but she needed to hear it from someone she doesn't see all the time, ya know??? so now that she is feeling MUCH better and I know her life is safe so I told her (with a HUGE SMILE..take this lightly or it will sound soooo wrong)
IF YOU EVER DO THAT...and if you think I will speak great things about you, you are wrong...
I will say...."This girl had a GREAT calling on her life. When she was really down I found a verse for her to read to bring her hope but she chose to take her life, what a waste." We were CRACKING up (I guess we are "sick" individuals?) she says to me, laughing "NOTE TO SELF..do NOT let Robbie speak at my funeral." LLOLOLOLLLLLL
there is a point to all this....just hold on.
if you were with me Wednesday, you know I brought two mattresses home that fell off a man's truck..yes, I am going to have to pay to haul them away but it's God's money anyway.....and even if He never blessed me again, He has already blessed me so much that what I did was NO BIG DEAL...I want to SERVE others....maybe you can understand this, maybe you can't...
Last night we are finished with dinner and I ask Mike to pull the trash to the curb (COMPLETELY FORGETTING ABOUT THE MATTRESSES....and we have been sooooooo busy, I had never told him) Mia comes in and says "I told Dad about the mattresses" and then I remember "OH SHOOT!!!! I WAS SUPPOSED TO CALL THE TRASH COMPANY TO ASK THEM TO PICK THOSE UP!!!!!"
as I am trying to call the company and leave a message, Mike is asking me where the mattresses came from and then he hears me say "I know it will cost us pick up but if you could PLEASE get them tomorrow?" on their machine...he asks me WHY we are paying to haul away mattresses he has never seen before and when I look at him he says "you know, I probably don't even want to know" and I just said "you wouldn't understand" which may or maynot be true...I would just have to go back so many days to explain to him...
so I am sitting at the table and he is sitting in the chair and my girlfriend who had wanted to end her life that morning but was okay by the afternoon, called me. I picked up just in case something had changed....but when I answered, it wasn't the typically HAPPY me...
her "you sound dry"
me "what's up?"
her "I was just calling to see how your Zumba class went?"
me..(hearing Zumba, I perked up a little) "it was GREAT"
(Mike leaves the room)
her "what's going on with you?"
me "I sent Mike out to take the trach to the curb and I forgot about the mattresses"
her (I could hear her holding back a laugh) "he didn't understand?"
Both busting out in laughter to the point of tears....
me "I didn't try explaining"
her "oh my gosh that is the only thing that would have made this better, is you trying to explain it to him and the look he would have given you."

Am I crazy? Is doing a good nice helpful deed, crazy? If it is...then I AM crazy.
(Mike is not mad at me...he's just confused because, well, wouldn't you be if mattresses appeared out of nowhere?)

but my girlfriend tells me "Robbie, if we all spent more time being helpful to others, the world would be a better place."

Thank you girlfriend.

I really hope they pick these mattresses up today.